17 May 2006

Movin' on

I've been really down in the dumps lately. Darts aimed at me seemed to settle on target. I spent Sunday licking my wounds and trying to get some rest. It's a lot harder to wear armor and to defeat the forces of evil when you're runnin' ragged and sleep and energy are evasive. Things haven't been terrible, actually there have been so many great things happening lately, but I haven't focused on them. I let the bumps in the road and the deterring remarks of nay-sayers get to me.

But, I'm done with all of that today. It helps to know that a ridiculous amount of study for my radiology exam paid off so that I passed the test. There is a glimmer of hope that I can actually pass the class for the quarter. Gotta keep on keepin' on. The incredible team that I work with planned a phenomenal 2-weekend seminar that helped so many students and doctors in chiropractic.

I also recognize that some of the wounds inflicted by people around me seem to follow a trend that I've experienced before. I'm surrounded by very competitive people, and sometimes they like to exert authority over me or put me down in order to make themselves feel better or superior. I'm competitive, too. . . with myself. I want to be the best ME I can be. I also want the people around me to grow into tremendous leaders and become the best at what they aspire to do. I'm not intimidated when others around me excel and surpass me in areas. In fact, I think that's the goal of leadership--to help those you lead succeed you ten-fold. I'm very blessed to be surrounded with a dear husband and some incredible friends that share my mentality. We don't try to one-up each other, but share in each others joys and successes, and encourage one another in rough times. We don't grow jealous when someone gets an incredible opportunity, but we celebrate and are excited.

This isn't the first, and it's definitely not the last time I'll encounter people who reflect their own inadequacies and insecurities on me through harsh words or actions. It's also not the first time I've encountered careerists who will do whatever it takes to shove everyone else off the ladder in order to climb to the top. Unfortunately, people who try to tear others down, or bleed off others' successes don't see the big picture. I am becoming the person God designed and intended me to be. I am doing the very things that God wants me to do, and I have no desire to become someone else or to do anything other than God's plan. I will not be pidgeon-holed to someone else's plan for what he thinks I should do in current priority decision-making and future career decisions. The plans that God has for Steve and me may make no sense to anyone else around us. But then again, we don't think or prioritize our life goals like most Americans. So, people can tell us we're crazy for wanting to move to the other side of the world for an indefinite period of time, and they can dog on me for saying NO to what may appear to be glittering career options. But, we're not deciding what others think is best for us, we're choosing to do what God wants us to do.


Blogger Holly said...

This is a very inspirational and encouraging viewpoint, and one that is called for as we seek to exemplify and grow in Christ. I applaud you for your reflection, Dolly. And I agree wholeheartedly with your words.

19 May, 2006 16:11  

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